Lameness Update

Mort stayed very slightly lame all last week. He didn't have heat or swelling in his legs, nor did he respond to any poking and prodding that I tried. He was sound at the walk. He was sound at the trot tracking right. He had a tiny head bob tracking left. I gave him some time off with the intention to hop on Sunday to decide what to do. I had a fresh pair of eyes on him when he moved and to look over his legs. He was still slightly lame. She looked him over and thought that our best guess was a stone bruise. That made sense with his lack of other signs and it was certainly not a bad prognosis so I liked it. I talked to the other ladies at the barn. I talked to my mom. I thought about it long and hard. I decided to hold off on calling the vet. I figured if it was a stone bruise, waiting another week would fix it and I wouldn't spend any money unnecessarily. If it was something more serious, our walk rides and lots of days off probably wouldn't cause something more serious to get any worse. I hopped on yesterday for our easy ride. I have been doing 10-15 minutes of walking on the buckle, then trotting on the buckle to look for a head bob. Since I've been seeing it tracking left, we go back to walk and that's about it. Yesterday I didn't see a head bob. I did loose rein walk and trot a couple times and still couldn't see it. He felt forward and about the same as he normally does at the beginning of our rides. I decided to risk asking for more. I picked him up a little bit and continued on with our warm-up. I did some circles and changes of direction. I asked for connection. I did some canter each direction. I did small circles. I did some light lengthening. I did some leg yield. Throughout all of this, I would drop him back down to a loose rein trot and look for that head bob, but I kept not finding it. He felt forward and game to do a lot more than what I asked. We walked in the field and came back to the arena for more loose rein trot--still nothing. Of course, last night I was alone so there was no one else to confirm (or deny) that what I was seeing and feeling was real. I know Mort pretty well after our four years together. He doesn't always move like a "normal" horse right away, but he feels great after we get over the hump of how he carries himself. But, I was worried that I got used to him feeling 80% sound last week, so maybe last night he was 95% sound and it felt good in comparison. I was also worried that I was justifying him being sound because I want him to be, but maybe he was more abnormal than usual even though he felt great at the end. All of us horse-moms get a little paranoid when our horses aren't quite themselves, right? The barn owner got home as I was untacking, so I decided to throw Mort on the lunge line so we could both watch him go from the ground. I sent him out tracking left and asked for trot. He gave me his crappy little shuffle trot and it didn't look good at all. I figured that I had just ridden a lame horse and couldn't notice. But instead of letting those first few strides dictate it, I asked for a bigger trot. His head got steady and he looked sound. I trotted him around on the lunge for several minutes and he kept his more forward trot and looked fine. So now we're in a sort of limbo. The show's entries officially closed yesterday but I can pay $20 and late enter. I didn't feel quite confident enough to enter him last night before the deadline, though I did shoot the show secretary an email giving her the scoop. Basically, I'm going to wait until Thursday to decide. There will be people at the barn to watch us go on Thursday. If they think he's sound and I feel like he's sound, I'll enter the show and hope that it's not already full. If he's worse than he was before our ride, then it's probably more than a stone bruise and we may need some diagnostics. Here's to hoping that he's fully recovered and we can show.

Lame

Welp, Mort was lame last night. I noticed that he had the tiniest amount of stocking up in his legs when I was grooming. It was so slight that someone who didn't look at his legs every day wouldn't have noticed. I wasn't overly worried. He's still adjusting to being inside during the day and it was barely there. We walked on a loose rein and he felt a touch slow, but I figured it was just because we were walking next to another horse as the barn owner and I chatted. Eventually we moved off into a loose rein trot and there was a head bob. He didn't feel super lame but since he was on a loose rein, it was noticeable. It was definitely the type of lameness that I could have hidden if I had picked him up. Obviously I didn't pick him up to do that though. Instead I double checked with the barn owner that she was seeing it too and she was. So I went back to walk. I figured that we'd do a lot more walking and I'd supple him up a bit to see if that helped. After a good deal of walking, I tried trotting again. It was definitely better and basically not there at all tracking right, but it was still there tracking left. So I did a little more walking and called it quits. I paid even more attention to his legs when I was grooming again. The stockiness was gone and I couldn't feel any heat. I'm only about 60% worried at this point. He had gone out with his friend for the first time all weekend (because his friend was away at a show) the night before, so they might have played hard. He might have had some soreness from working harder the day before. I certainly don't think I pushed him too hard and he felt great through that whole ride, but you never know. It might also be time to look into injections for those front fetlocks. It might also be a career-ending suspensory injury because of those front fetlocks. I'm 75% sure it's one of the first two because he got better with more work AND he played with his friend a bit after our ride last night in turnout. He doesn't hurt too badly. I'm 20% thinking that it's just time for injections. There were one or two instances this winter where I maybe thought I might have felt an off step so I've been paying extra attention. I'm 5% thinking that he's broken forever because I wouldn't be a horse owner if a part of my brain didn't go to worst-case scenario. He'll get today off and I'll see how he's feeling Wednesday. If everything is back to normal, we'll have a few easy rides and get back on track. If he's still lame, well, then we'll have to dig further.

Knocking on Second's Door

Folks, Mort and I made up for our poor ride on Thursday with an awesome ride yesterday. I'd been wanting to hit a couple of second level items all last week, but it never worked out due to weather and the lesson. We got a couple of easy rides in instead of what I wanted. Easy rides aren't the worst for him mentally though, so whatever. If we have a couple rides where it's basically a glorified warm-up we're no worse off for it. (This doesn't really include the lesson and him getting away with being lazy for a whole ride.) We started off as we always do with several laps on the long rein. I stopped him from my seat a couple times. He is improving with these but he's still not perfect. He yielded off both of my legs well. We moved into trot on the loose rein. He thought about being lazy for a bit but worked out of it. I did some walk/trot transitions. We did some big changes of direction. I started to pick him up and do some smaller circles. I did a couple canter transitions. He was working into connection and we were starting to rock-and-roll. I decided to jump right in after a short walk break. I picked him up and asked for a walk/canter transition. He stepped right up, only a little off balance and against the hand. I told him what a good boy he was and we cantered a circle. I asked for a canter/walk and he only had a small moment of thinking trot before dropping to walk for me. I asked for another and it was just about perfect for where we are now. He stayed connected and stepped right into it for me. He got much praise. I should have stopped with that, but I am the worst and didn't. I asked for another and he ugly trotted. I brought him back down to walk and he was tense, so I did some figure eights and such at the walk to get his topline back. Once I had him back I asked for another and got one that was prompt but similar to the first. I still told him what a good boy he was and did call it quits on that one. I just did two the other direction and they were both decent, if a bit unbalanced and stiff. I then worked on a couple canter/trot/canter on the other lead and he was good. I need to remember to actually ride those few strides of trot and not just sit and pray for it to work out. After some canter work he got another walk break. By this point Mort and I were really clicking. He was jazzed and ready to go but still listening to half-halts and moving off my leg. I played with a couple of really good (for him) medium trots across the diagonal. I didn't even have to push and ask, I just allowed him to take me. It was a ton of fun, especially considering how much he's struggled with these in the past. I wanted to touch on the shoulder-in, across the arena, shoulder-in from 2-1. Mort killed it. It was easy and basically seamless. I (thankfully) learned my lesson with the canter transitions earlier and only asked for it once. At this point, I was running of out things to work on from 2-1. So, I decided to work on my sitting trot for more than just a few moments. Holy poop I am out of shape. I think Mort could theoretically get through 2-1 but I'm not sure I could at this point. We'll see how the next week goes. I'm heavily leaning toward just showing him first, but there is a 10% chance I might try second. I doubt it. We did some trot/halt/trot transitions that he also nailed. We ended the ride with more walk work. I do have to give credit to the instructor from last week with my head tilt. I'm definitely thinking about it not tilting right for now and it is helping. This was the best ride that Mort and I have had in a long while and it's not like we've been short on good rides lately. I can really feel second level and I'm happy that my boy is back in shape and we're ready to start stepping it all up again.

Lesson Re-cap

Let's just preface this with the biggest thing that I learned last night: Have more confidence in myself to communicate what my horse needs. The H/J gals at the barn had a big fancy H/J trainer down from Chicago. They have lessoned with her before and really enjoy her "attention to detail". They all had good things to say about her both before and after their lessons. So it's entirely probable that I had a bit of a dud lesson and it's not the trainer's normal. She was nice and did have correct things to say about a lot of things. I want to say that I'm sure she's extremely knowledgeable and clearly is good at her job according to a lot of people. It could have been a fluke or a difference in H/J versus dressage or something else entirely, but I definitely had a disappointing lesson last night. Mort and I did a couple laps of long rein walk, then we stopped to talk about where we were and what I was working on. I told her we were somewhere between first and second and we work on through-ness, and connection, and crookedness, and all of the regular things. She wanted to know if we had any lateral work (that was a red flag since you should definitely have at least some lateral work if you've already shown first as it's vital in training a horse to use its body). I told her we had leg yield and shoulder-in and that we had haunches-in and half-pass at the walk. She sent us back out to do our warm-up. This is where I should have warned her that we had a bit of a long warm-up. I almost did, but for some reason I stopped myself. I think I was worried about coming across bratty. I was paying for her expertise so she should see what we needed and perhaps have a few pointers on the warm-up itself. I'm really bad about doing what an instructor says during a lesson and not having a conversation about it because I don't want to come off as too big for my britches. Anyway, I didn't say anything and we went off to our warm-up. I did another couple laps of long rein walk with a couple halts from my seat. I started in on our long rein trot and big changes of direction. I did one trot/walk/trot transition. I barely started to gather him up for connection and she called us over and asked me to circle and we got to work. Mort was still behind my leg. He wasn't using his hind-end or reaching for contact yet. We hadn't cantered, which is vital in our warm-up because it helps get him going. Overall, I was about five minutes into what is regularly a fifteen minute warm-up. Again, I should have interjected here and asked for those additional 5-10 minutes. If Mort isn't in front of my leg we have nothing. We have the Mort I had this winter who is sticky and grumpy rather than the Mort that I like who is fun and game. Instead, I got on the circle with my barely training level horse who was pokey. I wasn't having to kick him to stay in the trot, but he was underpowered. She talked about my position and that I sat crookedly and tilted my head a bit to the right. Those things are true and things that I work on fixing. She was the first instructor who told me to look at the left shoulder instead of the right rather than just to look up. It did help, but I'm not sure looking down is the right answer. It may help me mentally to fix the right head tilt though, as it at least gets me thinking about it. I tried to throw in some figure eights like I would in our regular warm-up. I tried to do my systems check of yielding him off my legs. She had us stop and explained that his haunches were supposed to follow his front end rather than yield out. It was good that she didn't see me asking for exactly that and she wasn't wrong that we wouldn't want to do that on a regular circle. But again, not ideal that I didn't stand up for myself and tell her that I had asked for it. At this point, I figured out that she wasn't sure I knew a whole lot. This is fair, since I never told her my personal experience. I'm always scared to tell new instructors that I've ridden through fourth level in case I come off as "braggy" or it doesn't look like I ride like someone who has ridden at those levels. We then stuck to the circle which is something Mort isn't a fan of at the beginning of a lesson. He needs those long sides to rev his engine, mixed in with some smaller circles to challenge his balance. Needless to say, I never got the powerful Mort that I know is in there. She worked us bending inside and making sure his haunches didn't swing out. She asked for more connection and a higher connection with my inside rein and a lower and more allowing connection with my outside rein. These aren't bad tips as long as I don't get too uneven. But, I knew that so much of our struggle to even maintain a connection came from Mort just puttering along, so I was frustrated. We did this both directions. We did go over some cavaletti which was fun. Mort has gotten a lot better in the last three years of me not doing them which was a pleasant surprise. I'm guessing it stems from me making him more responsible for taking care of himself the last year. We took a walk break and then finally cantered. She wanted a more forward canter but we were still stuck on a large circle. I did get him a bit more forward in the canter than I could in the trot because he thinks it's more fun. At this point, I could tell that I wasn't riding up to my potential. My hips weren't as open as they should have been, nor were my shoulders back. Unfortunately, neither of those things were commented on. She just wanted me to work on my hands and connection. We went across the diagonal and did a couple of simple changes through trot in the corners. The long sides let me start to finally rev him up. She did call me on not riding the trot strides in the simple changes which was good. Right when we finally started to get a decent canter, she asked us to walk. She made a comment that he was sweaty and could hear him breathing in the canter, so she knew that this work was harder than his regular work. This frustrated me even more because it was so, so much lazier than our regular work. He is a naturally very sweaty horse and is always snorty in the canter. She didn't know either of those things, but bleh. At this point, I had gone on way too long in the lesson to correct her. We had been so lazy for so long that if I called it out I would have sounded like I was just making excuses. We ended the ride with some walk work on contact. She had made a comment earlier in the ride that I was riding against the walk which is something that no one had ever told me before as I usually am good about swinging my elbows with his mouth. So I asked for some clarification on that. We worked on it, and as soon as I stopped thinking about my hands and just focused on getting a good walk she said that I had it right. I'm guessing that we were a bit off because he had been so behind my leg earlier in the lesson and now that he was moving a bit better it worked itself out. So, Mort never really got in front of my leg or moving into contact until the last walk work. I was really frustrated because he hasn't felt like that for a whole ride since our dreaded lesson in March. We're capable of a whole lot more and I hated feeling like he was getting sticky again. There are a lot of emotions attached to that feeling for me. It was frustrating that she never called us out for not being forward. Not once did she say he needed to use his hind-end more. She talked about lowering it, but wanted me to do it via lifting my hands and having good connection. That's part of it, but definitely not the first step. This is where I think there is just a difference in H/J versus dressage. Every dressage instructor I've had gets on us right away for Mort being underpowered. It was embarrassing that I said we were trying to move up to second level and Mort never got past training level work. I don't care that we didn't work on specific lateral work or "tricks" but he never had the connection and thrust and carry that a second level horse should have. It made me look like I didn't know what I was talking about. I almost warned about a longer warm-up at the very beginning, but I didn't. I almost asked for a longer warm-up before getting on the circle, but I didn't. I almost asked to canter earlier while we were on the circle, but I didn't. I almost asked to do some long sides, but I didn't. A lot of this comes back on me. If I had set us up for success, I probably would have been able to get more out of the lesson. But unfortunately, I get to stew about Mort getting almost a whole ride being behind my leg and I get to stew about looking like an idiot who thinks her training level-looking horse is almost ready for second.

Lesson Re-cap

Well folks, since I last posted: The clinic was rescheduled for June due to the clinician being flooded in out in Kansas Mort spent that weekend running around like a fool, throwing a shoe and earning a few days off But we've been back to our regularly scheduled programming for the last week, so I opted for a lesson Monday night with my regular instructor. Mort and I have been working more on our canter. I've been throwing in shoulder-in and lengthenings as well as our regular circling and figure-eights and leg yields. I've been trying hard to maintain a good connection through it all without over facing him. We're slowly starting to step back up into dressage land. The good news is that Mort and I were much more prepared for this lesson than the last one. We're both in better shape mentally and physically. We went back to the beginning and I believe that our connection and forward are even better than they were before. We were actually able to work on things and she was able to push us without anything breaking down. The lesson was fun and challenging and gave us some homework--all things that I look for in a lesson. We started off on a loose rein where I filled her in with what we'd been doing and where we'd been struggling. We did the "systems check" and Mort was good for moving forward/stopping, moving off either leg, and suppling to the rein. Even in that loose rein walk she wanted me to throw in transitions, so I halted him from my seat a few times. He wasn't 100% sharp, but he responded decently. Working on halting from my seat with no hand for back-up is on the homework list. Since all systems were go, we moved on to a loose rein trot. He was forward and would yield from my legs. I played with turning him from my legs and seat. She again asked for more transitions than we're used to doing, so there were walk/trot transitions in there as well. Since we had forward and sideways and supple, it was time to start picking up contact and asking the hind-end to do more work. We started doing smaller circles and figure-eights, all while still doing transitions. My homework with this part of the warm-up is a million more transitions and to start asking for more sooner in the ride. She kept repeating to let the smaller circles and figure eights challenge him while I stayed steady and was there for support when he asked for it. Once he was starting to be more reliable in the contact we threw in some canter transitions. The point of these wasn't to work a lot in the canter, but to keep him thinking about me and what we were going to do next while challenging his balance and hind-end. We'd canter for a little bit, getting him over the topline then go back to trot, only to re-balance and ask for canter again. We did this a handful of times each direction. Tracking right was a lot easier to rebalance and go than tracking left. Homework here is to do more transitions (again) and to make sure that he stays off my inside leg in the transitions. I need to get comfortable with getting him a bit uncomfortable so that he starts looking to me more for guidance and balance. After our warm-up, he got a long rein walk break. I re-checked our systems and he was good. We've really improved tracking right, but still can get a bit sticky tracking left. It may be time for another spur ride to get him a bit sharper off that leg. I also have homework to almost constantly think about sitting harder on my left seat bone when tracking left because I have a tendency to let his crookedness make me crooked. Part-Two of this issue is my uneven hands. My left hand is too timid to take enough contact with the left side of his mouth and my right hand tends to be too high. This creates a lovely little head tilt. These homeworks aren't anything new, but they're definitely still homework. We then got into the meat of the lesson. She had an exercise where we'd start down the centerline and leg yield off the right leg, when I got to the end I'd keep the feeling of leg yield but I'd do a small circle by changing my outside aids to turning aids. We worked on me maintaining even hands while weighting the proper seat bone then making sure that I used my outside leg to do the turn. For him, it made sure that he was listening to my sideways aids and my turning aids. Eventually this exercise can transition into leg yield to: shoulder-in, lengthen, or canter. It gets his hind-end stepping underneath and preps us for whatever I want to do next. Once I start introducing the other items, whenever we feel a loss of balance or through-ness we just go back to the magical circle. Mort did better than I expected. Leg yields have never historically been our strong suit. I know that I tend to lean to the outside and he'll get crooked (obviously) and lose power. The first attempt was a bit crooked but once I started using my outside aids correctly we got some good work. He felt powerful but focused to the right. The left wasn't as steep and we did need the circles at the end to rebalance, but they were still pretty successful. He actually does listen almost too well to the outside turning aids there, just need to work on me maintaining the bend through proper riding. My homework here is to start to start playing with more complicated items after the leg yield like I mentioned above. I'll be looking for the feel he's ready and waiting for me to ask for whatever and he'll be game. The canter was a ton of fun. I expected it to be better than the trot and it didn't disappoint. We started off on the right lead canter. The leg yield was good, though the shoulder led a bit. I haven't done a ton of leg yield in the canter, so I was just glad that it was working so well. We did some smaller circles at the end and he kept cantering and coming under himself though I could tell it was hard. The right lead was fun and successful--the left lead was even better. Again, our steepness wasn't there as much and he struggled a bit more with the small circles but it is such a better canter when I get it where I want it. On our last attempt she told me to get my shoulders above my seat more and I moved them right a fraction of an inch. Immediately Mort lifted more and felt straighter. It's amazing what a small difference can make. Our homework in the canter is to focus more on my upper body position; I need open hips but with a tight core and more even shoulders. We need to do more small circles to build his hind end strength. We'll also use the exercise to transition into lengthen canter or counter-bend and leg yield the other direction. In doing the counter-bend, I need to always have a feel that we could go back into a circle of true bend at any time. We ended with a little stretchy trot after Mort's final canter circle. We were both so happy with what he gave me that it was the perfect place to stop. We, of course, walked on a loose rein to let him mull it all over and relax before hopping off and giving him his well-earned treat.

Weekend Updates

Friday was misty and cool, but instead of hauling out we all decided to wait out the rain. I was both relieved and disappointed. I was nervous to haul Mort someplace new both because he hasn’t travelled a lot lately and I was worried he wouldn't get back on the trailer to come home. But I also knew that it would be good for us and get us to the facility where the clinic is to help him get used to it. Oh well--we may have a chance this week as there is even more rain in the forecast. Ugh. Mort was awesome on Friday. He stood well for grooming and tacking and I didn't have to tackle any of the standing issues that I did on Thursday. I did throw him in his stall after I had groomed him and wrapped his legs because the rain was taking forever to go away and I didn't feel like making him stand ground-tied for an hour. All four of us were riding together, but Mort did a good job keeping his focus on me instead of wanting to hang with his friends. This is a noticeable improvement from our time here and riding with others regularly. He was nicely forward and we warmed-up on a loose rein in the walk and trot. I started to pick him up and he stayed with me. I played with the shoulder-in on a circle that we had worked on the day before at the walk. I can tell that it's difficult for him, but he came around to it a lot faster and with much less of a struggle in both the walk and trot. I cantered him and he was really "there" for me. Of course, when he's on I ride better too. I felt my hips open and I was sitting up and able to use myself more efficiently. I touched on some counter canter, but not a lot. I was mostly just reveling in how he felt. I did test the collection with some smaller circles. I also touched on lengthening and shortening. I think he came back to me better than he ever has. He is always happy to slow down, but he usually wants to fall on the forehand. Friday he came back and kept his hind-end underneath himself. Good pony. I played with trot a little more, but mostly I was just having a good time an encouraging him to reach into the contact. He happily did so I didn't work all that long. I asked for a lot and he stepped up to the plate. Last weekend I noticed that he's filling out again along his topline and his haunches. Friday I got to feel the results of him getting back into shape. I'm glad that I have a trainer that made me go back and start from scratch again. He couldn't physically hold himself up, so when I was asking him to he was getting (rightfully) pissy and tense. That added with the fact that I didn't trust him to go too forward for the last several months at our old barn made for a really sticky Mort. Now I feel like we're heading back to a place that is even better than where we were before. I think his connection is more true and I know that I'm more aware of my seat and legs. After our clinic this weekend, I'll try to put another lesson in the books with my regular person and get some new homework. I'm excited to see what she thinks of our progress and to see what she thinks our next steps should be. Mort got Saturday off because of my laziness, but I did ride him Sunday. I planned on keeping it easy both mentally and physically since he was such a champ on Friday. Sometimes keeping things simple is hard for me because I tend to want to pick and fix and drill, but I was good and we never got above a training level frame. I did a lot of loose rein trot and just played a bit with him working into a low and steady contact. We didn't canter and I only barely touched on lateral work at the walk. He got a quick grooming and tossed back outside to eat grass in the sun.

Dressage-ing

For the last couple of weeks, I have been starting to feel hints of where Mort and I were before all of our time off this winter. He's pushing from behind and getting more and more consistent about connecting up front and looking for me. I can feel him getting stronger and settling back into our training. (Yay!) So, on Sunday and Monday I decided to ask him for more and see how he handled everything. We touched on lifting and some collection. We did bend/counter-bend in canter (and trot). I asked for walk/trot and trot/halt/trot transitions on a figure eight. We worked on rapid walk/trot transitions every four or five strides. I played with some shoulder-in both within trot and within the transitions. For most of it, he was mediocre on the first try but rapidly improved with the following tries. I only did each of these things a handful of times before I was satisfied and moved on. I didn't want to fry his brain, nor did I want to fry his body. I would touch on something and move on as soon as I felt it connect. I'm so glad that he's coming back to where we were. I'm glad that I've got an instructor that makes me go back to basics when things fall apart instead of trying to put a band-aid on our issues. I'm glad that Mort can take a joke.* And I'm glad that everything that we had is still in there somewhere. Mort is the perfect horse for me to learn how to train. He's forgiving and willing to try. But he's also lazy and won't fake it for me if I'm not doing what I'm supposed to. Since he had two harder days in a row, yesterday was much lower key. He was on the buckle until well into our trot work. He's so happy to stretch down and do our big loopy figure eights just listening to my legs and seat to turn. We spent a lot of time taking breaks at the walk. I did eventually pick up some light contact but didn't ask him for anything more than a training level frame. I touched on leg yields at the walk just to keep him even between my legs. And I did take time to pick him up and let him down at the walk as I always do. But the ride was short, easy, and pretty fun. It's amazing how much I'm learning with Mort. He's so sensitive to how I'm holding my body that he's training me to be a much better rider. I'm getting more zen and patient about my riding, which is a huge feat considering my need to control and plan everything. Retraining Mort is probably one of the most challenging things that I've ever done, but most days I'm just out there having a blast and soaking in how awesome my horse is. *I am the joke